Science is ALWAYS The Answer!

Today is overflowing with good fortune.  It is amazing that it has been bestowed in one day on an organization generally besieged by misfortune.  The day isn't even over yet, so there could be more coming!  It's like Amazon just told me I am the lucky customer who will have his entire wish list filled for free!  I am so excited that I can barely contain it.  Or, for you equine fans, it's like the night before my birthday when I'm finally going to get the pony I've been asking to receive for the past 30 years.  The anticipation of the countless adventures AcMo will be able to experience is staggering.  All of our dreams are about to become reality because of science.  Maybe I do want to marry it--even if that would be weird.

First up is this amazing news:  Breakthrough In Nuclear Fusion: MIT Researchers Find A Way To Increase Energy Output 

As a super added bonus, I found a ninja hiding in the reactor!

AcMo will soon have its own high output fusion reactor!  This power source will allow us to run HQ1 forever without having to deal with the power company or power outages again.  This means we will be able to utilize our wind tunnel and dynamometer all day every day.  Once we have fully absorbed the technology involved and figured out how to reduce its footprint, we will also have an unlimited power source for our space ship project.  There's so much victory in this one breakthrough that it's like I got a stable full of ponies during one birthday.  The fact that I found a ninja trapped in the reactor is almost too much for me to process.  I have to make sure to write a post-it to get him out before we fire up the reactor.  He may be the last ninja after all.  I never would have thought to look for one inside of a fusion reactor.  What if the reactor made the ninja?  We could have ourselves a nuclear ninja.  The possibilities are staggering!

The ONLY potential downside to this new, untested reactor is the small chance that it could explode which could--but probably wouldn't--release the energy equivalent to the sun into a concentrated area.  The outcome might be a few decimated countries, or a black hole.  I'm hoping for the black hole because we should know how to control them by that point.  I'm bringing this up just to make potential investors aware of the risks and because we value transparent operations.

There's even more scientific goodness coming our way, and by distant extension, yours.  Of course we will have maximized profit margins so that we can pass the savings into our operating budget instead of to our customers, but that's how business is won at the levels we play.

World's largest X-ray laser can capture images of molecules at a sub-atomic level

"The world's largest laser x-ray gun will begin operations in September this year in Hamburg, Germany."  The first sentence of the article is all you need to see.  If we combine a smaller version of this laser x-ray gun with our rail gun trafficide weapons system and power it with our upcoming miniature high output fusion reactor, we will have an unbeatable combination that will define ground superiority in traffic combat for generations.  I couldn't and wouldn't (because it never works) have planned for so many technological advances to appear exactly when we needed them most.

This laser x-ray gun thing will also allow us to see everything at a molecular level.  That isn't so exciting, but once we can see it, we can start to learn how to manipulate it, and that means we can start doing for people what we to do engines.  Now that is exciting!  AcMo Human Performance Development will take performance modifications beyond what anyone thought possible.  People will soon become meta-humans.  Before anyone asks, I will be the first person modded, and of course I will give myself the speed of The Flash.  It makes sense.

Sometimes it seems like those who have everything receive all of the cool gifts.  The (nuclear?) ninja trapped probably isn't even needed now because technology has delivered something even better.  AcMo now has a way to get the data it needs in order to finally realize our dream of building a championship winning engine, and it all became possible because of WiFi.  This is a rare day, but everything has come together for us today.  This is the best kind of day.  We may have to shut down all operations after today because I don't see how it could get any better than this.

How Qualcomm hacked home Wi-Fi to grab Formula One car data in seconds

Soon its secrets will be ours...and Honda's.

The sad part is that I don't care if Honda ever has a race winning engine.  As it stands now, they don't even have a consistent race finishing engine.  The problem is that I made a promise to perform a miracle, and I feel I wouldn't be the best version of myself if I didn't follow through on that promise.  According to the article, Qualcomm removed a lot of WiFi's standard security protocols in order to increase data transfer speeds between the car and pit lane computers.  Our mission, which should result in an article titled, "How AcMo hacked Qualcomm's hacked WiFi to grab all of The Mercedes AMG F1 Team's data in seconds."  

All we have to do to make this happen is get close enough with our hacking tools to intercept the signal before routing it back to its intended destination.  As long as we are operating in milliseconds, I don't even think anyone will know what we've done.  Thanks to F1's new owners opening up access to the paddock and pits, I think we can have this whole thing completed before the end of next month!

There it is.  Three amazing breakthroughs in one day that will forever change the way AcMo operates on Earth and in space.  A day like today doesn't happen often, so I hope all of you appreciate how special it is and savor it for as long as you can.  Tell everyone you see that AcMo is coming with lasers, fusion reactors, and maybe a (nuclear?) ninja (if necessary).