An Honest Track Test

I was just musing that it would be refreshing, and quite a change of pace to read an honest appraisal of a car's performance during a track test.  A rather well known journalist crashed a high profile vehicle about two months ago.  There was a mention of it on Twitter, but I don't think the details of the crash, or his impressions made it into print or video.  I didn't search for it though.

Imagine the world that would open to everyone if the journalist had said, "The car is no doubt amazing.  It is able to perform in a manner that exceeds my abilities and defies the established boundaries of physics.  Bumps that upset inferior cars at half the speed are soaked up by the suspension and chassis.  The car lets you know the bumps are there, but it also laughs at them as it looks for more corner speed.  For example, entering the high speed turn 3 at Circuit X requires commitment, fortitude, and a willingness to perhaps meet your maker.  I lack all three of those criteria, but I chucked the car into the turn anyway without braking, wondering if the reported downforce it was supposed to be creating would hold us on our trajectory.  There is a bump on the inside of the turn that will upset the world order if it is hit at the speeds I was traveling, so it is critical to stay to the left of it.  This brings up the very real possibility that there will not be enough track left at the exit.  Over or under commit, and there will be tears.  A lot of tears.  Much to my surprise, everything worked as it should.  

As the laps increased, I became more bold.  Turn 3 was now my plaything.  This was a corner that had beaten numerous professional drivers into submission.  No sane person could look at this corner and not register a bit of fear, but here I was, in the latest, greatest, and shiniest hyper car bending the track and car to my will.  I was unbeatable, until that last lap.  Call it mental fatigue, adrenaline overrun, or just an expiration of talent.  If you want to be cruel, just focus on the expiration of talent part.  Whatever the cause, that last lap is one that will forever mar my memory and that of this magazine's bottom line--we all have insurance, but just consider a scenario in which our premiums don't increase, yeah, I couldn't either.  I set up for the turn just as I had the ten previous laps, but this time something was different.  I was carrying more speed than I had at any other time.  I sliced through the turn, reveling in the unseen downforce pushing us toward the tarmac,  mentally and visually tracking my line toward turn 4 when the unthinkable happened, or rather, two unthinkable events happened simultaneously, for which there was no recovery.  The physics I had so boldly proclaimed didn't effect this car, effected this car, and I ran out of talent.  The latter occurred much more rapidly than the former, but the effect was predictable.  I managed to reshape some suspension bits and body panels.  The car was mostly still drivable, but my pride was damaged beyond recompense.  As was my wallet, and any goodwill I had built up with my employer,  the manufacturer, and our insurance underwriter.  I do hope our premiums were paid.  Find out next week if I crashed myself out of a job.

This vehicle is the definition of a hero car.  It was a dream to drive and there are probably no better dual purpose cars available today.  I can, without hesitation, recommend anyone with the means should secure one, but make sure it isn't the car I crashed."

Now that is the type of track test I would pay to read on a regular basis.  It is doubtful that there are more than a couple of auto manufacturers who would be willing to constantly supply production cars to journalists who used them as crash test vehicles though.  The event I fabricated is based off of a real incident, and I learned today that the journalist in question has released a video of him reviewing another car belonging to the manufacturer of the crashed hyper car.