Project TTP

Testing at Road America continues through the weekend. Our client's privacy is paramount, so AcMo can't disclose specifics until the appropriate clearances have been issued.  I am taking this opportunity to share information about an ongoing project back at AcMo HQ.

This project has occupied AcMo's resources for months. Other viable projects have suffered as a result, but this is important to AcMo's image. We are striving for a prestigious record that no other company would even dare attempt:    the fastest bird title. We need to prove what we can accomplish with an open checkbook. While the checkbook is open, there's nothing in the account, but that has never deterred AcMo. 

We met our development bird, Fred, the same way we meet all of the birds:  he crashed through the shop window just before closing. I think he was lost, dazed, and confused. Fred is not within our target demographic, but we sawa spark of genius in him. 

Since Fred had made such an effort to get in the door, I felt I could at least give him a shop tour. We started in the clean room. His eyes grew when he saw our latest engine project. It was of course a twin turbo equipped engine. Fred knew he had found a new home. It would be months before his first test flight because his crash left him with a broken wing and severe neck pain. We were glad we would not be required to pay worker's compensation since those injuries occurred before his employment at AcMo. 

Fred's entrance was rather fortuitous. We had been negotiating for months with Sega to allow us the use of Sonic the hedgehog and his likeness. Sonic has the breakaway speed we respect at AcMo, and he's blue, which is one of our colors. Sega didn't feel that Sonic could be loaned to us despite our assurances that we were not going to optimize him for higher top speed. We weren't going to do that because we had noticed an obvious midrange flat spot on his dyno run that we were going to address. Boosting that deficiency would increase his overall responsiveness, and had a knock on effect of raising his top speed. In the end, we couldn't come to an agreement with Sega, and Sonic was too fast to catch in our traps. 

The road runner had proven too mischievous for our serious corporate image. Sonic is faster anyway. 

Chester cheetah was also an option, but he appears to be an underachiever, and I don't think he can move fast enough. His TV appearances would also interfere with our development schedules. 

We had resigned ourselves to using our Swingline stapler or generic three hole punch for our mascot when Fred crashed into the building. That was the birth of Project TTP. 

The first week produced problems that still haunt us. As a result, the Twin Turbo Peregrine project has stalled. Either turbochargers do not work the way I thought, or the technology to adapt them to falcons has not yet been created, but this project is not happening.  We need some DARPA level minds to provide guidance.

Explained a bit below are a few of the obstacles the engineering team is facing.  The weight of the blowers prevents Fred from lifting off. That's before we've installed the water to water intercoolers, and the requisite plumbing. 

My engineering staff has gone over the plans multiple times, but the answer is still eluding them. I'm not certain at this point that any of them even are engineers. 

We tried to 3D print variable vane turbos small enough to accommodate Fred's power to weight goal. These showed initial promise, but the boost hit caused Fred to lose control of his tail. 

We then developed electronic controls to ramp boost in a gradual manner, but this caused Fred to overspeed toward the end of his dive, and crashing at the kind of speeds Fred can achieve could be fatal.  To combat that, we developed a 3D printed carbon fiber/kevlar crash helmet with integrated head and neck protection.  Fred was already dealing with a sore neck from his first crash into our building, so we didn't want to take chances with his safety. The increased power also necessitated creating a shaped floor, front splitter, and rear diffuser for Fred.  We've basically created a miniature jet body to house Fred while still allowing the use of his wings and tail.

The development on this project shows no sign of abating as we work through one failed concept after another, and I now realize that I should have sent Fred to an F1 team. They would have had him flying with an ERS and DRS system by now.  He would also be so quiet that you wouldn't even hear him coming until it was too late.

If you see Fred dive bombing near you, or hanging out waiting for a launch window, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT approach him.  The turbos and extra bodywork have made him very aggressive, and distrustful of people shaped objects.

Development work here resulted in the initial stages of our next project, the Twin Turbo Greyhound (TTG).  Extra care was taken during the jaw and teeth fortifications to prevent injury when our TTG catches the hare for the first time.

This post is about our work with Fred. Project TTG will have to wait for another day. We are working hard to solve the many issues so that AcMo and Fred can take their rightful places in the hall of fame.