Jack of All Trades

AcMo is the epitome of a corporation that is a jack of all trades. We operate in every market that has profit potential. That way when the next economic downturn occurs, we will already be involved in the surviving and hopefully also thriving market sectors.  This approach makes generating consistent profits difficult, if not impossible, but we are positioned for trouble.  Our paper products division has the capability to print money if we ever get too low.

The question regarding AcMo's core competencies comes up a lot.  We are able to pivot and attack new industries with abandon because we don't have any core competencies except acceleration.  This means we are not constrained by conventional wisdom, and nothing is impossible to us.  We are all about speed here.  We create fast and we fail even faster. That allows us to move on to the next great idea before we can become mired in details and regulations.  We have so far been one step ahead of the regulations.  That is the only area in which I would consider AcMo lucky.  Everywhere else we are not good.

We, which is to say me because no one else here knows how to use a shovel, have been developing a skill for digging holes this week.  Each new skill set allows my evolving brain to make new connections which allow me to see the world for what could be instead of only what is.  I have been told that hallucinogenics have a similar effect, but I can't confirm that.  I prefer my all natural method which doesn't leave me vulnerable to leaping off of tall buildings with the belief that I can fly.  I know I can fly, but I doubt many other people can.

I had to hold a double ceremony this afternoon for two birds who didn't survive their attempts to breach our defenses.  I dug two holes in preparation for the burials, but then realized that I could double book one hole to keep the ceremony simpler.  While this may be illegal for people, I'm not worried about any trouble from the bird union over this.  Besides, you get what you pay for, and those birds didn't pay for burial services and their insurance won't cover the costs.  I know because I called the company to seek reimbursement.  One of the bird strikes must have happened while we were away testing if not before because it was mostly skeleton when I buried it.  This is not a fun activity, and I have to keep this from Fred because we don't want him to get rattled before we attempt our first launch.  I don't like keeping secrets, but if Fred knew how many of his brethren were dying because of our windows, he might not be too happy.  We are looking into creating a sonic barrier that would deter the birds from approaching the windows, but at the moment the barrier is breaking windows in the adjacent buildings.  What I really should do is aim it at Omnicron Corp., but it is just out of range.  They must have done that on purpose. They shouldn't know the range of our just created sonic barrier, but somehow they do.  I need to get the research department on that.

AcMo's research department is the most important one we have because they keep us competitive.  I'm still miffed about the syndication mix up, but we have to rebound from that setback and continue moving forward at maximum speed.  It's the only way to stay ahead of the competition and the regulations.  We tend to break those faster than they can be written.  Now that is fun.