Small-scale Hydrophobic Tendencies

This Porsche print ad has been part of the AcMo permanent collection for more than 20 years.  It has served as a beacon for the AcMo ship as it navigates difficult waters with the omnipresent threat from competitive forces.  AcMo would be dashed against the rocks if not for the sage wisdom appropriated from proven leaders.  Technological advances since this ad was published have created productivity tools that allow for committee members to sabotage each other over large geographical distances.  This is a good time to mention that committees now run Porsche.  Coincidence?  Probably, but we'll know for sure once we form a committee to research it.

AcMo took a contrary view to the power of committees.  Through some trial and a lot of error, we have discovered that committees can be powerful tools if named properly and the right personnel are involved.  For example, the Committee for a Better Tomorrow doesn’t actually do anything until tomorrow, but because of the important connotations of the name, the members feel empowered.  Empowered members equal a better work ethic and more production.

Powerful committees are not too different from multi-level marketing scams.  If the committee leader chooses the hardest working and most ambitious people to join the committee, proper results are almost guaranteed.  The best part is that the committee leader can take all of the credit for doing none of the work.  This is why I lead every AcMo created committee.

We are forming a new committee today to study the performance potential for a new type of paint technology.  Snob Duben brought this tech to my attention.  He was supposed to be busy prepping the F-ONE cars for Malaysia, but he couldn’t be bothered with that because it was interfering with his web surfing time.

Snob’s surfing yielded two related stories about a magnificent paint that can revolutionize high performance driving.  The first article might seem disconnected, but it isn’t.  Hamburg is pee-proofing its public places.  I wasn’t aware that paint suffered from phobias until he sent the first article.  It is amazing to me that paint is afraid of anything other than peeling.

A thorough skim of that article produced a link to an earlier story about the development of this very special paint: Nissan's dirt-phobic paint keeps a car spotless for the duration of a PR video.  Now this is where I start to bring the situation around to AcMo.  The paint’s biggest drawback appears to be the duration the paint’s hydrophobic efficacy lasts.  This isn’t a problem for us since we can upcharge to spray a client’s car on a regular basis.  In fact, we prefer a guaranteed recurring revenue stream.

People think keeping a car clean is important for the sake of appearances, but we know better.  The ONLY reason to keep a car clean is to maximize its aerodynamic efficiency and therefore its speed around a track.  This water repelling paint would do wonders for the windshield and overall visibility during inclement weather.  We may have to utilize our advanced VR tech to supplement the paint on the windshield, but we’ll know for sure after we’ve had time to test.

The committee is also responsible for finding every other potential use for this paint.  We are looking at methods to increase our vehicle speed.  Coating the tire treads to create a water repellent slick so we can lap faster in wet conditions has floated to the top of the possible column.  The computer keeps crashing when we try to run the simulation, so we won’t know if we have something until we are at speed on a wet track.

Snob’s timing could not have been better even though he should have been constructing cars instead of surfing the web.  Once we find a paint source, we can immediately start coating our client’s vehicles in time for the rainy season.  The testing mileage will be invaluable to our continued efforts to produce the fastest lap times with the least amount of effort.  The AcMo Max Time Attack Committee has been convened to assist with that.