Bored Nate

Nate looks a lot different in satellite imagery.

Nate is a friend who has his own HVACR certification program.  I was quite surprised when I discovered this.  I got over my initial shock and was gradually accepting that Nate certification was a sign of excellence in the HVACR field when I made another startling discovery about Nate.  I didn't learn this from him, but from this article:  Nate could hit the Gulf Coast as a hurricane on Saturday night.  Moments after reading the headline I sent Nate a message asking what he had against the Gulf Coast, and also inquiring why he didn't have something better to do on a Saturday night than mess up the coast.

He blames me for harming his certification program after creating a boycott Nate hashtag.  It was trending long enough to cause HVACR professionals to question who put Nate in charge.  Of course, Nate did, and they didn't like that.  He decided to abandon his certification program, but that left him without anything to do.  Strange things start happening when Nate gets bored because he has too much free time.  He had originally started his certification program because he was looking for a way to eliminate his boredom.

There is a fine line between testing and wreaking general and/or specific mayhem.  I know this because most of our testing becomes specific mayhem within seconds.  I am an expert on the matter.  Nate informed me that he had been working for the past 15 years on a weather modification device because he wasn't satisfied with his position of excellence in the HVACR world.  He desired more direct control of the market.  His belief was that weather control would allow him to impact the use of HVAC systems around the world, thus increasing the need for his certification for qualified service technicians.  He also doesn't enjoy raindrops falling on his head, so he viewed the capability of preventing any rain from ever reaching him as an added bonus.

I don't know where he set up his secret lab to conduct his tests, but he admitted that he had finally achieved success this week.  I have isolated the lab's probable position to the vicinity of Atlantis, but since I can't quite figure out where Atlantis is, I don't think I can plan an assault on his lab at this time.  He also gave me a warning not to cross him.  He seemed to know that I was trying to plan an assault on his lab.  I think he found out my Magic 8-Ball was low on magic and thought AcMo was in a vulnerable position.  That is far from reality, my friend.  I have been planning for multiple doomsday scenarios since AcMo's inception.  This is one of the many situations I have prepared for in our innovation lab because I always knew Nate could go Cat 5 under the right circumstances.

AcMo created a weather mitigation device years ago to use at track events when it was raining.  We never got the chance to use it outside of testing because it worked a bit too well and would cause random wildfires.  I put the prototype on the shelf until I could figure out what had caused it to become a pyromaniac.  It only took a couple of adjustments to transform the weather mitigator into a Cat 5 anti-hurricane hurricane generator.  The principle is so simple that I almost don't want to explain it.  AcMo's simple device generates a vortex that spins in the opposite direction of the weather system we need to mitigate.  Our precise calculations allow the wind generators to create a force that is equivalent to the storm.  The only downside to our device is that it requires an enormous amount of energy to operate.  The grid is not equipped to handle our power demands which is why there were several unexplained massive power outages in the US the last few years.  Yeah, that was us doing our thing.  Sorry about that, but we had to know for sure we could protect AcMo at all costs.

Proving that we had a functional anti-hurricane hurricane generator was the first step.  We had to let Nate know the power we had at our disposal.  Nate could not use his hurricane generating powers against us under any circumstances.  Apparently he knows how to plan for the long game also, and he built an anti-anti-hurricane generator.  I countered with a knowledge bomb that contained the maths needed to prove that his device would not cancel mine, but would counteract his own hurricane generating powers.

Cat 8 isn't on the scale because that is an extinction level event.

What happened next was quite a surprise.  Nate admitted that he has created a way to go Cat 8.  I did not think that was within anyone's capabilities, so I did not have a proper counter prepared.  That won't be a problem though because I'm sure I can create a solution by Saturday night.  The winner will be apparent if Nate hits the Gulf Coast as a hurricane.  I apologize in advance if my solution arrives a bit late.  I'm quite tired, and since I'm not on the Gulf Coast, I don't feel the urgency required to make this happen right now.

Nate slowed down earlier today so he could establish a satellite connection to send a message.  He wanted to make sure we would be ready when he goes Cat 8, so he provided a chart with the calculations we needed.  He thinks he's making it a fair fight by giving us numbers we would have figured out on our own in a few weeks.

AcMo Speed is faster than that.

I used the numbers he provided to create the plan.  We are going to do the only thing AcMo can and drive some cars through the eye of the storm.  Each successive vehicle will create vortices that will destabilize Nate.  Then we'll hit him with the hurricane breaker right in the eye while he's wobbling on his axis.

Credit:  https://goo.gl/tRrZiL

The steam car might not even be fast enough to make it to Nate's eye, but it doesn't matter because it will create an opening for the rest of the cars.

Credit:  https://goo.gl/326CW1

 The F1 car might make it to the eye, but definitely won't come out the other side looking the same.

Credit:  https://goo.gl/Huwe4G

The same goes for this Honda.  Each of the cars pictured above will probably end up crashing to save the Gulf Coast.  It isn't that we're willing to lose so many vehicles, but we need to know that our hurricane mitigation system works in case Nate decides to go Cat 8 on AcMo HQ1 in the future.  He won't even think about doing that if we can stop him on the Gulf Coast.  This is an important test for AcMo.  That's why we brought real speed to the party.

Please say hello to our hurricane breaker:

Credit:  http://ridingmode.com/thrust-ssc/

Our fearless beta tester will pilot the Thrust SSC (on loan and renamed for this mission) through the storm at any speed higher than 431 mph.  Game over, Nate!  I hope our beta tester survives the trip because we still need him to test our flying mech suits.  He won't get one equipped with an optional railgun (some assembly required, ammo NOT INCLUDED) until we can be certain he won't use it on us in retaliation for tricking him into driving through a hurricane.  I'm sure it will be fine.