Ne Plus Ultra

Credit:  https://goo.gl/4VJFem

Right now you are ogling the greatest engine ever built.  Why?  Because I wanted you to do that.  Take in every intricate detail and understand that you lack the capacity to realize a product so magnificent.  This engine was supposed to be built to Gordon Murray's exacting specifications, but it wasn't.  He wanted an engine with 550 hp that weighed around 225 kg.  Gordon Murray had asked McLaren's then F1 partner, Honda, to build the engine, but Honda knew then what they don't seem to know now, which is that they can't build powerful, reliable engines on demand.  Undaunted, Gordon asked several other manufacturers to create his dream engine.  All of them declined.  He finally got around to his friend, Paul Rosche, at BMW, and a deal was struck.

"Nocken-Paul" (Camshaft Paul) went to work creating an engine better than anything that had come before it, and arguably better than anything produced since.  I don't know if Paul knew he was about to build the apogee of modern internal combustion engines, but that's what he did.  Those exacting specifications that Gordon Murray wanted in his engine were not met because the BMW V12 Paul delivered weighed about 270 kg.  This weight increase was unforgivable to the man who was counting every single ounce in the build of his ultimate dream car.  The extra weight would throw off the precise math that Gordon had been obsessing over for years.  All was lost!

Camshaft Paul had a pleasant surprise for Gordon:  the engine didn't produce 550 hp either.  Nope, since he couldn't get it to weigh what Gordon wanted, he added a little extra power.  Gordon was pleased with receiving an extra 77 hp over his desired number.  This made up for the extra kilograms.  That same engine was modified AcMo style for 2 lucky owners who were able to boast 691 hp.  This is a 6.1 liter V12 engine that has no rivals.  I get goosebumps thinking about it 20 years after it ended production.  No one has made a better engine yet.  I defy you to come up with just one example that comes close.  This engine powered a road car derived race car to an overall victory at Le Mans on its first attempt!  In fact, the results were the best for a manufacturer's Le Mans debut in the history of the race.  A lot of that success resulted from having the best engine ever.  It was a bit of an unfair advantage.

Since AcMo is moving forward with the invincible engine block project, we thought it made the most sense to start with the absolute best engine we could find.  That was an easy selection since we had one of these BMW S70/2 V12s in the shop already.  It was supposed to go back into a client's vehicle, but that didn't happen for some reason.  Now we can take our time and improve upon perfection before reinstalling it.

The problem with creating a strengthened engine block may not be immediately apparent to you.  It wasn't to me.  Strengthening one part of a system without addressing the others simply shifts the weak link down the chain but doesn't eliminate it.  We lost six test engines in our beta tester's Subaru before I saw the pattern.  The blocks are not yet invincible since that tech takes time, but they are reinforced.  The crankshafts, pistons, connecting rods, and every other part are still standard and those parts can't handle the increased cylinder pressures resulting from the reinforced block.  We've seen every one of those components fail as a result.  The only good news is that none of them have been able to penetrate the block so we can keep reusing it.

I have infinite patience when it comes to blowing up engines, but our beta tester was starting to get mad since we have to charge him for the new components each time.  It was around the time of the fourth explosion that I realized we might lose his business if we couldn't come up with a solution.  It took two more spectacular failures before I had the epiphany I needed to fix this project.

Read this part slowly and let it marinate in your brain:  WHEN REINFORCING A SYSTEM, EVERY SINGLE COMPONENT MUST BE STRENGTHENED TO ELIMINATE ALL OF THE WEAK POINTS.  I have that taped on my bathroom mirror so I see it every morning before I go into the shop.  I used to think it only applied to vehicles, but now it has become clear that it is an important life lesson.  Don't forget this or you will waste years of your life sorting through the debris field trying to understand what went wrong.

Build number 7 on our beta tester's car is on hold while we switch to a much better canvas.  The shop gremlins have already disassembled our client's S70/2 and we are working out the process to strengthen every part before we attempt to reassemble it.  You might have noticed that I didn't mention anything about invincibility coatings, and that's for a good reason.  We are still working on perfecting the formula, but we have found some success in increasing strength while we continue to approach full invincibility.  We don't have time to wait for the formula, so we need to learn what we can by using the strengthening approach.

Credit:  https://goo.gl/4VJFem

When we crack the invincibility coating mystery, we will have done the impossible by improving on the world's greatest engine.  AcMo will be known throughout the world as the smartest, most innovative and fearless engine re-builders to have ever graced the Earth.  I anticipate a great pyramid being built in North Carolina in honor of our achievements.  Based on the time it is taking to reach invincibility, I have calculated that the entire engine should become invincible in about 375 years.  I hope North Carolina will still have land available for that pyramid.  This timeframe shouldn't be an issue as long as we are able to master time travel within the next 20 years.

There's a lot of pressure involved in this project because AcMo's professional reputation is on the line, but we thrive under pressure, and soon we'll have access to invincible skin coating so we will never break or crack under extreme pressure.  We could achieve success any day between now and 2392.  The S70/2 will still be the greatest engine ever built even in that late year.  I just hope some of you will be there to witness the moment we do the impossible once again.